The Old Man on the Porch

Age, Hair, Health, News & Views, Personal

The best thing about growing older, I think, is that you’re able to pretty much choose what (or who) is positive and helpful to you. You realize that you can amplify/multiply what’s positive, and you ideally have no time for what’s negative. Also, I find you gain a superpower — invisibility. This is especially helpful if you’re an introvert like me.

Invisibility is easily achieved. Two points —

1. In the mood to be left alone, I have purposely gone to the store wearing pajamas and slippers, with my hair uncombed under a hat, bringing my walking stick even though I might not really need it just then. I proceed to move at a very slow, leisurely pace; which I prefer anyway. Works like a charm. No one sees me. Invisible!

2. If you choose to look presentable and noticed on a particular day, you’re able to make an odd choice, and it’s celebrated rather than fussed at. I like that, and have taken full advantage. You probably know that I have blue and purple crazy hair, and without exaggeration, I dress like a wizard. (I have my choice of several drapey cloak jackets, extra long scarves, and harem pants.) I’m comfortable, and it’s fun.


Cannabis is legal here in New York, and we have a store downtown. Know who I see going in there? Young people? Nope. Not at all. Middle-aged+ people who look like they could be your grandparents.

What of the aches and pains, middle-aged health issues, and even surgeries? It’s going to happen to all of us, and has already happened to many people you know who have simply not mentioned it.

You learn to manage it. I think of it as the price of knowing what I know, being respected, and having a certain freedom to do as I wish.

Sure, there will be a few people that don’t like this or that, and they will fall by the wayside. That’s on them. I find that miserable people often want everyone else to be miserable too. To those people I say, “I wish you well, no hard feelings, and don’t let the door hit ya in the ass on the way out.”

Speaking of doors, I’ve amended the old saying — When a door is slammed in your face, make sure you’ve brought a hammer … so you can nail that shit shut.

7 thoughts on “The Old Man on the Porch

  1. karenadair1017's avatar

    THIS! this is why I LOVE YOU! YOU my HERO! i am getting there. i also dress a bit like a sorceress. even if i consistently wear shorts, a T, or casual short sleeved buttondown, and flip-flops (my total go to), i have several sheer, light long sleeve, full length “dusters” or drapes, and also midsleeve midlength drapes, which i wear regularly, a few of which were probably meant to be worn as light robes over lingerie! i also wear a scarf regularly. for hot days light sheer ones, and for that couple weeks of winter nice pashminas! our whole family, all the Bugarins and Adairs, has agreed on my eccentricity. BUT i talk to EVERYBODY! Hi, Hello, Aren’t you CUTE. la la la la la. and peeps make their birth about me wider! ahahahaheeheehee! ❤ 😀

  2. Unknown's avatar

    I love reading your thoughts. Currently not wearing hats or pjs outside, but in PT for knee issues to postpone replacement. Onward!

    1. Phill's avatar

      Best wishes for the PT! I’m just naturally a bad fit mentally for PT, but what I learned there did help me a great deal.

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